Today we talk about safe gaming. I don’t mean better protective gear for American football players or strict security at casinos. Nope, the topic is tabletop roleplaying games (TTRPG), and how game designers and publishers, gamemasters (GMs), and players can create a safe gaming environment for everyone. This discussion is not new; I’ve found references to expressed concerns from the 1990s. Yet, remarkably, for many people in the hobby safe gaming is a new concept. And sometimes, unfortunately, a threatening one.  

I don’t want to rehash twenty-five years of discussion here. The why of safe gaming is self-evident if given a moment’s reflection. If not obvious to you, many people have expressed the need for safe gaming mechanisms; here are a few excellent articles: Safety Tools by Golden Lasso Games, TTRPG Play Culture, How Do Safety Tools Work? Three Tabletop Safety Tools

Today I’d like to talk about how to structure a safe game experience for yourself and others.

Prepare for Safe Gaming

A ttrpg is about to begin! Perhaps at your friend’s house, or a game shop, or a convention. Maybe you’re running it, playing for the first time, or it’s the final session of a long-running campaign. The first step to safe gaming is a bit of introspection. GMs can ask themselves:

• What assumptions have I made about my players? You can’t understand everything about people, even those you’ve known for a long time. We’ve all had different life experiences, and no set of experiences are the norm.
• What assumptions have I made based on the game system or scenario? Could my players’ ideas of what is appropriate for a horror game, for example, differ from mine?

Players can ask themselves:

• What game situations make me uncomfortable?
• How would I go about communicating that information? To friends? To strangers?
• Does this game description even sound like a good fit for me? Do other aspects recommend it?

Some safety tools are designed for the GM to ask the players these questions well in advance of the start of play.

Implement Safe Gaming

Thoughtful game designers and GMs have come up with several tools to put game safety on table. Here are a few I’ve experienced.

Lines and Veils

Attributed to Ron Edwards in his game, Sex and Sorcery, lines and veils are the group’s, the game’s, and each players’ limits for in-game content. 

A line is a definite limit: that content has no part in the game world. A veil is more porous: that content won’t happen “on stage,” but it can be referred to as a background event. A common example is torture. A gaming group could decide to never play any game with torture content. That is a line. Or, if they play a variety of game systems, some darker than others, they might decide that the party can hear about torture and it can be part of the story, for example their motivated to rescue a victim. But the story will never directly feature it. That would be a veil. 

Another example: An individual player may not want to deal with in-game romantic relationships. That would be a line for that particular character. Romance might be part of the story, but not for this one character.

X Card

The X card is less specific than lines and veils and helpful if the players aren’t too shy to make use of it. John Stavropoulos developed the X card, which is literally a file card with an X written on it. Tapping the card means the player is not cool with the direction of the narrative. The scene can be rewound and tried again. 

Its lack of specificity could be an issue. The card can go beyond a silent signal, and the player briefly explains the problem to the group or the GM, privately if need be. 

For example, let’s say we’re playing Kids on Bikes:

GM as my character’s father (yelling. Really getting into it): “Where are you going, young lady? Do your homework right now!”

I tap card.

GM: Oh, you don’t want homework in the game? Sorry.

Me: Homework is OK. The shouting is . . . pushing some buttons.

GM: I understand. 

Reflect on Safe Gaming

After a game session, either alone or in conversation with the group (or one trusted vent-buddy), think about and/or discuss how the game made you feel. Unfortunately, many of us are accustomed to burying our reactions to social events because “that’s just the way it is.”  Life has taught us some level of violation is a cost of inclusion, even in mostly positive experiences. Actually, that’s not true. We can feel safe and comfortable at the game table, and everyone can have a good time. 

Awareness is the first and most important step. If something felt icky, knowing what it was will help us tell people what we need in the future. GMs can verify nonverbals (body language) to help them learn to pick up what the players may not feel they can say out loud.

Check out some of my other gaming blogs: Improv for Gamers, Playing Games, De Profundis, Scrapbooking Through the Multiverse, or Microscope.

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